Gateless Gatecrashers

A great new book about ordinary people guided by Ilona and Elena to see through the illusion of self. It can be a wonderful tool for examining your own beliefs and concepts. Have a look!

To go to the Gateless Gatecrashers link, click here.

Resistance

Why don’t people want to wake up?

I am baffled after talking to various people. Most people seem to want to not suffer, be content and at peace. They might even be seeking enlightenment, nirvana, to wake up. But when presented with the possibility, there is huge resistance to LISTENING, to even considering the fact that there could be something as non-mystical and simple as seeing through the illusion of self (and the ensuing peeling of the layers of delusion) that can be the first big steps for this journey

Why? Why don’t we want to listen? Here are some thoughts I’ve put down.

1. We are happy as we are. But there is always a striving for something more, which is contradictory to this claim. On the other hand, this striving is what keeps people going in the world of duality.If you're happy, great!
2. We are secure in our ‘knowledge’ of how life is. The unknown is scary, even if the results are guaranteed to bring contentment. The continuing of a familiar, albeit suffering-filled life is the only acceptable option. People like the familiar, the known, the safe.
3. The conditioning goes so deep that the very thought of someone challenging the belief system is impossible and to be rejected.
4. We feel we will be lost without the framework of a given ‘law’, or guidelines on how to behave, what to do, etc.
5. We believe that this ‘version’ of awakening has to be false, it is something only our religious teachers or spiritual gurus can lead us to, after years of praying, practice and striving. How can it be so simple? Therefore it can’t work.
6. With the seeing through of maya, comes the dropping of identifications. What then of us as the victims, the worriers, the achievers, the seekers, the good wives, the excellent mothers? And so on. Who are we without our images of ourselves?
7. The seeking will stop. But the seeking is what keeps us going. It is like an identity, like so many others.
8. It cannot be something that us ordinary people can ‘achieve’. Only the pious and the saintly ‘super beings’ could possibly be spiritually enlightened.
9. There has to be a willingness to be brutally honest, to be brave enough to face that life may not be what they thought it was.  Perhaps some of us are not ready for it. It is much easier to pretend to oneself that we are moving forward on the journey, when actually we are not going anywhere at all.

One can go on analyzing, wondering. But I guess what the whole thing boils down to is FEAR, fear of the unknown, fear of losing what we have, which might not be perfect, but it’s what we know.

If you are ready, let’s take a jump into the unknown. It really might be worth it!

Nothing to say.

I do not know what to say.

It is strange. After the fire, after the spike in energy of the past months, there is a curious burning out, a quietness inside.

I really have nothing much to say. The people who are close to me, find me a little strange now, and I find myself not engaging much, not feeling a desire to interact like before. I am finding it difficult to engage in the usual talk, chit chat, work discussions, social talk. The things that seemed so important once, seem irrelevant now, and a little meaningless

Does that mean I am not content? No, not at all, kind of the opposite. I am so content, that I feel no desire to ‘do’ things to find happiness, or security or pleasure. I have reactions, I feel happy and sad and angry, but they doesn’t last long. Passes through quickly, and I am left with a near-constant peace/love/gratitude combo.

What does it mean? I have no idea, and no real desire to find out why either. Perhaps I should be looking, perhaps it is a place I am in danger of getting stuck in. I have read, of course, of the dangers of getting stuck in nothingness, in emptiness. But it does not feel empty at all. It feels alive and joyful, perfect as it is

I will write of any changes as they happen, as best as I can. But to be honest, words fail me these days.

Another story

And od course, the blog post below is nothing but yet another story... A story running through this character's head... Does anyone know anything for sure?

2012, Special or not?

It is the beginning of 2012, a new year, a fresh beginning. Of course, all a new year is, is a concept, a man-made division, but useful nonetheless, and a chance to review and rethink.

So what happens now? Is the world going to continue on its mad path of wars, power struggles, greed? Or will there be the end of the world, a 'paradigm shift' or 'wave of awakenings', as many would have us believe? Anything at all? Who knows. I was skeptical, thinking what a load of nonsense all this hype was.

Now, I watch what's going on in the world, in Liberation Unleashed, other sites like it, spiritual books selling like hot cakes, and I stop short. Loads of people seem to be having spontaneous awakenings, or looking for places such as Unleashed in a state of readiness, and I wonder. Is there really anything to be said for this, are people really 'popping' all over the place,  or is it just that I am looking from this perspective, 'in that interest group' so finding similar thoughts, similar people.? I don't think so. A question someone had put up in our group, whether the people working in LU had a vision to help heal the world, or was it just a hobby made me think and write about this.

Will the world change if enough people awaken? Do people change from their innocent but egoistic, selfish behavior after liberation? I would think so. When you know you are not a separate entity, the drive for 'me' and 'mine' becomes so significantly less. I won't say disappears completely, because, of course, you continue to eat and survive (leaving aside the discussion about how much conditioning survives awakening, and how much is animal instinct), but SO MUCH of our previous behavior seems pointless, in fact completely deluded at times. This is what I've felt, and would love to know if such behavior has changed in others. From my discussions in our groups, it definitely seems so.

After all, if your belief in yourself as a separate entity goes, then everything is as much ‘you’ or rather 'not you' as you yourself. No separation or boundaries. I see a starving child on TV, and tears roll down my face, at that moment, it is as I AM that child. I see love in a person's expression, and I feel love in MY  heart, and tears of joy appear. I can't watch emotional or depressive movies anymore, it sometimes gets to be too much emotion to handle. Perhaps this is different to how a realized person 'should' behave, but this is how it is here.  Why would I need or want to harm others? The very idea seems preposterous. There is so much love being felt.  After all, isn't it our belief in our ‘selves' which deludes us into fighting, working, struggling at the cost of others? No selves = no others.

Yes, to me, it really seems the world would be a better place if people were awake to reality. So I feel the work being done at Liberation Unleashed, and other places like it, is invaluable and I hope more and more people are inspired to help others. Unfortunately, the way to reality has been so shrouded in layers and layers of mystery, spiritual mumbo-jumbo, religious rituals and practices, that it is difficult to see how simple and attainable it is. Kudos to LU for stripping it of those layers and presenting it as it is.

And if enough people do come on board, perhaps 2012 WILL be special and the year of LOVE.

When the crutch of religion disappears!

As I realized to my great astonishment, I didn’t ‘need’ to believe in religion anymore. The always-present net of beliefs that had always brought me comfort at times of difficulty was gone, completely vanished, and it was ok! Along with the need for answers, the need for wanting a god who would make things ok when I had problems, a need for having something to believe in, a need to have a moral system given to me, a need to belong to a community, all that disappeared in one go, from being a constant crutch for me, to nothing. 

At times, it was disorienting. After all, the habits of a lifetime do not disappear, even if the beliefs did. I would find myself thinking the same thoughts, and then realizing,” oh, I don’t really believe that thought anymore”.  It was strange. I was so used to turning to God, Allah for solving all my problems. And, living in a country where almost everyone has the same religious concepts, it is especially strange. I would hear other people talking the same way, doing the same things, and I remembered myself doing exactly the same just a little while ago, and now being completely out of it. I have to say, at times I found myself thinking, “oh silly people, don’t they know it doesn’t matter if they’re praying five times or none. Do they really think they’re going to be punished in hell if they don’t, and go to heaven if they do”, or, even worse, “do these people need the threat of an external God to be good and charitable” whereas I, awakened being that I am just ‘good’. Tsk tsk. I stayed in the "I am enlightened, hence better than them" trap for a while.

People expect me still to teach the same stuff to my kids.  I struggled with that one for a while too, how to teach something I don’t really believe in anymore. Now, I’m letting life take its course. My eldest son has already reached more or less the same conclusions that I have, but in a more scientific way. My second one is religious, with the tendency to be too literal and rigid. Third son is the one who is slightly autistic. At the moment, I think he’s ok with the ‘good’ parts of religion. My daughter is still young. She hears a lot of rigid religious stuff, but at the moment, I make sure she knows that is not all there is. Help to keep her mind open. 

I see people around me who are searching, but within the religious boundaries. Furthest they go usually is sufiism, with its concept of merging with God, and God being all there is.  I think they are not yet prepared for the naked truth, that keeping within the boundaries will still leave you with residual beliefs, concepts and identifications. You have to throw it ALL out to get to the real. But as we discussed, if that is what is making them happy, then that’s fine. What makes me a little sad is how the religious clergy do their best to keep it mystical, difficult, far out of reach for ordinary people. It keeps them powerful and special, keeps the power game in their hands. Not good. I don’t usually go around broadcasting my beliefs, or lack of, but if someone asks, fine. I'm here to answer any questions.

  

Religion kept me focused on how this life was just a journey, real life was after death, after going to heaven. But after realizing this is all there is, I am appreciating the magic of every moment, the miracle of life happening anew.

A bit about doubts

As I was reading what I just posted, I realized that it might seem that after seeing no self, I had instant clarity and no remaining confusion or doubts. This wasn’t the case. I’m just writing a tiny bit here, and will expand on this later when I can. 

There was a major immediate shift, yes. Identification with thoughts, the seeing that I didn’t exist as a separate entity from life, etc.  What was seen can’t be unseen, like you don’t start believing in Santa again after realizing he doesn’t really exist. But the mind is very tricky, it continues to create doubts and confusion, doesn’t want the simplicity and truth of reality. And the conditioning of a lifetime doesn’t just finish instantaneously.

And so, one ‘forgets’, and can get caught up in one’s thoughts, emotions and so forth, like getting so caught up in a movie that you forget that it’s not reality. But you still ‘know’ that it’s not real, at the back of the mind, you know what’s real and what’s not. 

This continues to happen to me.  I think it is important to know that this is natural, and it doesn’t mean that you’ve gone into delusion again. 

This is my observation for now, but I would like to write more later about the ‘state of forgetting’ and ‘state of remembering’. But they are both experiences that come and go, and doesn’t mean you have ‘lost’ it. After all, reality remains the same. It is just the mind that creates the doubts, and they are no more than thoughts.